We’ve all had to get used to the concept of social distancing in the last year. Face-to-face gatherings were out, any events that were still happening were largely hosted through video calls. Some people may have relished during this time with the removal of socialising; there’s been more opportunity of introspection. When the measures are eventually lifted, the prospect of socialising again can be daunting. Here are some tips in preparation of the return.
Be reassured the your social skills are still there
Most of your social skills will have remained intact even though you’ve had last opportunity to use some of them in the last year. This is because you acquire most of them during your childhood. It’s similar to riding a bike – even if you’re a bit rusty in the beginning, it’s a fundamental skill you don’t forget once you’ve learnt it.
Small steps to build your confidence
There’s no rush or pressure to be full-on socialising, if you are nervous then it’s best to take it in smaller stages or goals so that it’s achievable at your pace. It may be that you start by meeting one person outdoors for a short period. Then gradually increase the length of time, frequency or the number of people to socialise with.
Avoidance doesn’t help in the long run
If you’re social anxious, the tendency might be to avoid social situations – this only brings temporary relief until the next occasion. Avoidance also will have unintended negative consequences, as you miss out on the positive experiences that can come from socialising, both in work or leisure. If we want to experience life fully, there are times where we need to embrace the discomfort, and face our challenges head on.
Involve yourself in what others are doing or saying
If you are constantly scrutinising what you are thinking and feeling, you’re lost in your own head rather than what’s going on. Get involved with others and with the purpose of the gathering. This will help you feel less self-conscious by taking the focus away from you, helping you feel better.
Be kind to yourself
Putting a lot of pressure on yourself to be a certain way with others can exasperate social anxiety. Some people have very high expectations that they need to be interesting to others all the time, which isn’t the case. Being with others is a shared experience, it’s not all on you. Be kind to yourself by easing the pressure. Also when you’ve taken those steps in socialising – celebrate those small wins.
Assess what you want for your social life
For some people, lockdown has helped them realise that they want to continue having a social life that’s lower key, perhaps with fewer people but deeper connections. We don’t have to return to the social life that we had before, particularly if we’ve found a way where we are happier because we’ve come to realise that we don’t need hundreds of friends.
If you need further support regarding social anxiety, Compassionate Cuppa is the mental health hug in a mug! We guide individuals towards uplifting their mental wellbeing through mentoring and practical support, so that they live life well. Find out more or book the initial virtual session for FREE on www.compassionatecuppa.co.uk/personal
Image Description: Group of people cheering together with glasses to depict socialising.
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